Friday, June 29, 2007
I think that she knows
Hiiiii, i break camp earlier. Hurt my leg and it's damn tiring. Like 4hrs of sleep everyday and 20hrs of activities! Not enough sleep is a sure-fire way to get me happy. Yah right.
I tink i haf an affinity with bruises. haha, i keep getting bruised and its the get bruised very badly like the size of a fist that kind.i'm like this huge kultz. I got abt 5,6 bruises on my legs and there's this one which is like the size of my fist and on the first day its swollen like a curry pok!
When xinyi saw it, she asked me if i'm abused at camp. hahahhahah!
You know? Nothing can really beat the feeling of being at home. Its when you're not ard then you appreciate it better. I realised that i'm often not at home and its getting really tiring. I guess i really look forward to spending more time at home, doing wad, i dunno, but yeah, just stay at home. I get bored easily though. haha.. and i promised to go for cac camp with bun and adventure camp with weifang. :X
i just can't refuse anyone. hahahah.
Anyway, i'll make good use of this few days to just rest and rest and rest. I'm very very tired. Haven't got a rest for a long time. Was physically tired after HK. Walk like shit. Then emotionally drained. Cried like shit. So now it's time to recharge and recharge. I've been wanting to read for one more day and the great gatsby but hadn't the time... i haven't finish the alchemist yet though. hahah. loser. Busy watching tv.
Anyway, i've a very BIG problem at hand. I dunno how to fire myself from all my students. There's this 2 students which i've tried all means to break contact with by playing the disappearing act and i thought i succeeded after more than a month but the mother HUNTED me down. So i said truthfully that i'm only free on weekend mornings and i dun want to hamper thier studies, schedule etc, so if the timings ain't right so be it. Either take it or leave it. Damn it, she agreed. So now, i've got no more excuses and i'm still saddled with 5 students.
Anyway, there was this phonecall which made my day from this tutee mom from quite long ago but i haven't blog abt it. hahah, i may haf told you abt it but bear reading this again, or just skip it. ( 1 person told me we got very limited convo topics & the other 1 said so you're trying to tell me you're very smart)ha, yeah, nice frens, hahah but its just that i'm very proud of these 2 tutees. They're bros, called jarron and justin. Monsters. Anyway, jarron topped his class for math then justin got 70 for his math while his cousin which i previously taught but was told to stop ltr on got only 50. The thing was justin was the lousier one who failed while the cousin get As. Somehow comparing always make parents happier. I haf no idea why. Anyway, justin's chinese even more imba. From 20 sth marks improve to 30 smth. lol! Eh, 30 smth also improvement k!
Yep, anyway, saw this on youtube which i tink is quite meaningful. Like how some of the words really mean smth. Inspirational. I like that.
"What can i say, we have so many memories, so many things tolook back on, i learned so much from you, gained so much. I love the way you made me laugh, i hated the way you made me cry, but what i hated most was when we said good-bye."
"& she's scared to get close to anyone because everyone that ever said i'll be there LEFT."
That day before i left for camp b4 sch reopens i tink, when i was at yet another lowest points in my life,
i asked xinyi : Are you happy?
She said : More of satisfied, contented with life, though a bit worried cos i haven't finish my hmw.
hahah.
I'm pretty envious you know? cos hmw is never much of a problem. At most get scolded lo, or go sch copy or hire a tutor to do the qns. These are stuff easily settled.
Now, i 'm too tired for anything, so its just
dance as though no one is watching you
love as though you have never been hurt before
sing as though no one can hear you
live as though heaven is on earth.
Yeah!! Live the life baby! Live it! Move on!
I got into KR, but darn, the pple whom i get to know and like are all going to biz or sheares.
Sunday, June 24, 2007
Fact of the day:
Do you know they sell nata de coco by the tubs??
Just how cool is that!!!! WOW!!!
youjustdon'tgetitback
Friday, June 22, 2007
When you're gone
I always needed time on my own
I never thought I'd need you there when I cried
And the days feel like years when I'm alone
And the bed where you lie is made up on your side
When you walk away
I count the steps that you take
Do you see how much I need you right now?
When you're gone
The pieces of my heart are missing you
When you're gone
The face I came to know is missing too
When you're gone
All the words I need to hear to always get me through the day
And make it OK
I miss you
I've never felt this way before
Everything that I do
Reminds me of you
And the clothes you left
they lie on the floor
And they smell just like you
I love the things that you do
When you walk away
I count the steps that you take
Do you see how much I need you right now?
When you're gone
The pieces of my heart are missing you
When you're gone
The face I came to know is missing too
And when you're gone
The words I need to hear to always get me through the day
And make it OK
I miss you
We were made for each other
Out here forever
I know we were
Yeah Yeah
All I ever wanted was for you to know
Everything I do I give my heart and soul
I can hardly breathe I need to feel you here with me
YeahWhen you're gone
The pieces of my heart are missing you
When you're gone
The face I came to know is missing too
When you're gone
The words I need to hear will always get me through the day
And make it OK
I miss you
Saturday, June 16, 2007
I've never felt this way before. Everything that I do reminds me of you.
Ahhhhhhh.... it feels damn good to haf eaten and bathe. Shopping with mfen and sha today. Wheeee! Went queensway after orchard to get fbts and our damn nice bags. They are soooooo punctual. Hmmm... as punishment for that maybe i'll post THAT blog entry HERE! LOL!
(ps: huilin and van, go to dazzling tale drafts and look at that post. I spent 1 plus hrs typing it and that bun saved it under drafts la. Even better, post it for me. =P)
I tink i fricking overspent today. The next few days will be all shopping as well. Except that its not on me. Ha. I tink after i come back i'll stay away from shopping for quite a while.
Ok, my mom is nagging at me. The flight is 8 hrs ltr and i haven't pack my luggage. Great. I'm damn shagged now.
Oh, and teasing/suanning/annoying pple is soooo fun. HAHAHAHAHA!
ps: thanks chups for that email. (=
Friday, June 15, 2007
I am a ballet dancer... in my toilet
MiNyI says:
can i haf hostel and cca
MiNyI says:
and not study
MiNyI says:
LOL
MiNyI says:
that'd be ideal
SweeT Xcape says:
can.
SweeT Xcape says:
ur next milstone in life..geylang
SweeT Xcape says:
milestone*
MiNyI says:
LOL
MiNyI says:
IDIOT
MiNyI says:
wth
SweeT Xcape says:
no la...i say go geylang sell frog porridge
LOL!
Okay, i'm stressed up now. Over a lot of stuff. I tink life is busier and more stressful now than when there's school. I was talking to a lot of pple abt 2 mths ltr. I tink i'll die from schoolwork, hall activities, cca, tuition, driving...heck, i dun even know abt driving anymore... I'm like the first to pass everything but i haven't even touch the steering wheel yet. Unless you consider daytona.
The timings for everything seem to CLASH! Ok, i need to go and bathe to meet the lians. I'm like wad am i still doing here.
Wednesday, June 13, 2007
Hiiii!!
Just came back! Today is a happy day! (: The super mario ride was damn fun. Hahaha. That machine takes your pic and you can see it in the game. My pic look darn idiotic. lol! And the drums was imba too! I love going to the arcade, feels like zhonghua days again. I feel young. haha. Next time we go play that again ok? haha.
Anyway was sending my recommendation form to yishu. Damn last minute. I hope past 12 doesn't mean i miss the deadline. There's like so much stuff to settle. I was reading his email and i can't help tinking about how i'll survive in hostel.
The room is like awfully small and you haf gotta sleep and study in that small room. I've never studied and sleep in one room before. Whenever i studied on my bed, there will only be one conclusion.
Fall asleep.
I always do that. Esp when there's reading to be done. And arts is like all reading. Shucks!
Then cleanliness. I'm a slob. Every time i finish using a piece of tissue paper, i'll just throw it on the floor or table, whichever is nearer. Even when i'm hafing a runny nose, you'll get a mini pyramid of tissue on the floor not the dustbin. When i do math on rough paper, after finishing that paper, i'll just crush it and threw it on the floor. But hey, that's cos i dun haf a dustbin in my bedroom and the dustbin in the studyroom is too far. But they will be cleared soon enough automatically.
And my clothes, after changing out, i'll just leave them on the floor and go out. The next day, they'll be back in my closet nicely ironed. When i need smth, i just shout. And if i need to go somewhere, i can ask my dad to fetch me.
But all these will change if i move out. I'll haf to wash my own clothes, throw my stuff into the dustbin duitfully, fetch everything myself... And my god! who's going to boil water for me to drink when i'm there?? I tink i'll just end up buying gallons of mineral water.
And much of a slob i am, I'm quite a cleanliness freak. I can't stand the floor dirty or even sticky and i hate it when my bedpost gets dusty or when there's fingerprint marks on the window panes.
If i live in the hostel i'll haf to clean everything myself. And my god, i've never done these things before. I haven't even unpack fully my stuff from tw and camping trip. I remembered telling that i'll ask jumintha to come down every sunday to springclean the room. But that will be so... *rolls eyes
Another terrible part would be the toilets. COMMON TOILETS! *faints. The shower head is like fixed on top and the water that flows out of it is like terribly little. And the toiletbowl... Dun get me started on it... There's no privacy. Imagine, when you want to poot, and its the lao sai kind, so its going to be loud... so the whole world is going to know wad you're doing inside the cubicle! My god! and sometimes i've got very active intestines. haha! wth!
And food! Basically its black pepper chicken, sweet & sour fish, veg today... Tomorrow will be black pepper fish, sweet & sour chicken, veg... you get the idea... The worst part is somehow the guy scooping the food will mix everything tgr... I haf no idea how... my piano teacher calls it pig swill. lol! i'm gg to be a pig. And vegetables are like eeewwww....
But loads and loads of fruits = YAY! The qn is who will cut the fruits for me? Huh? After dinner everynight, there'll be grapes, strawberries, rambutans, lychees, all nicely washed and cut and shell removed waiting there and all i just haf to stretch my hand out. Life without fruits everyday will be torturous and how to get all the fibre? Ltr constipation everynight how? my god...
And who will help me massage my eyes/face when i'm tired and kiss me goodnight every night? sobs! And i'll miss annoying my lil sister. I pratically live for opportunities to scare her or just make her angry. Its so fun. haha. And chowchow!! my sweet old honeybunch, my wide-eyed bambi! I'll miss her so much. She won't be there to announce my arrival or pounce upon me to lick me when i'm home or follow me wherever i go.
To sum everything up, life is going to suck.
So I haf simply no idea why i'm filling up my application now.
zzzzz... I'm so sleepy now....
Gotta wake up early tomorrow morn. Breakfast at Holland village, yay, then nus then shrek with mfen! Wheee!
Gd nite! (:
Monday, June 11, 2007
Anditboilsdowntoyourself
| You scored as History/Anthropology/LiberalArts, You should strongly consider majoring (or minoring) in History, Anthropology, or related majors (e.g., African and African-American Studies, Chinese, Classics, Cultural Studies, Economics, English, French, Geography, German, Greek, Hebrew, International Studies, Philosophy, Sociology, Women's Studies, or other Liberal Arts majors). It is possible that the best major for you is your 2nd, 3rd, or even 5th listed category, so be sure to consider ALL majors in your OTHER high scoring categories (below). You may score high in a category you didnt think you would--it is possible that a great major for you is something you once dismissed as not for you. The right major for you will be something 1) you love and enjoy and 2) are really great at it. Consider adding a minor or double majoring to make yourself standout and to combine your interests. Please post your results in your myspace/blog/journal.
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Bored. Ocean 13 ltr. Bye.
Sunday, June 10, 2007
So how now brown cow?
Don't you find that somehow at some point of time with wadever you're going thru, there's a song which can describe wad you're feeling?
There can be smth which you constantly dream of, looking at a future so fun and fulfilling which you know you will step into it, which you're just waiting for, which you know you will and want to share with this person but some things, some little things which simply destroys everything.
Its better to not haf anything than to lose it. Even if you gain new ones, they just ain't the same.
Somehow, some things just can't measure up even they are much much better. Losing smth is more painful than i thought.
I'm printing out the reccomendation form and i don't know if i shld pass it to you.
Reply to tags:
fen: tell me abt the heartbroken part!! =p it's so unlike you! WHO was it that broke your heart?? Come on, sharing is good! lol!
wf: cheers babe! I'm sure you can manage. Maybe will get broke from too much clubbing but, tink your ang moh will improve a lot. hahaha!
pearlyn: Hey, i just realised that this is the first time you tagged me after 2+ yrs! ha, yup, i'll most prob stay there.
yi shen: Errr.... sleepy... ha. WAIT! how do you come here? i dun remember telling you anything...
Wednesday, June 06, 2007
Beatrix ftw
Camp was pretty cool. There was lots of pple but not the a lot lot kind and the BG was relatively small so its good in a way. There's quite a few aj pple ard and there's this aj girl and aj guy senior in my BG so its non mihi solum. haha. And I put loads of sunblock but still got burnt. I looked like some lobster now. haha.
Anyway, on monday morning, i was seriously terrified, mortifie, petrified, stupified. The thought of going for the camp alone just makes me shake. I kept telling my parents on the car on the way there that i dun want to go then when daddy wants to turn back, i said, i want to go. Haha. Much as i was afraid of going away for the next few days alone, it presented to me as a challenge, a dare, and no way am i going to refuse a challenge. When i reached there, i almost instantly regretted my decision cos there's this bunch of ajcians there. Like very loser can. But after the first 15 mins, it was easy.
It was pretty much orientation stuff, but not really the usual sian orientation stuff that makes you want to pon. Hahah, i dunno how to put it but its much more fun than the usual. The games and stuff were much more interesting and exciting (tink lots of BG contact)lol!, then chilling out sessions, bbq, but I tink its mostly the pple. More of that ltr. Oh oh, we get to sleep in our own hostel rooms and its damn small. The entire room is like half the size or smaller than my bedroom. And the first night was scary. We were exchanging ghost stories over heneiken and there's this haunted room (true story which happened recently) on the 5th floor in blk D. My god, its like my block and my floor. I almost fainted when i'm in my room cos the blinds kept flapping around. -_-"
But one good thing abt kent ridge is that the whole place consists of only single rooms so there'll be more privacy and you can get to mug anytime you want. Everyone will leave their doors ajar so you can pop by your neighbours place to chat and study and eat and all sortsa stuff. And there's this camaraderie among everyone, how everyone is like family and everyone knows everyone living on the same block. Haha, i'm a sucker for this sort of camaraderie, family stuff. Then your frens not living in the hostel but STUDYING IN NUS (HINTSS!!! LOL!!) can pop by to bunk in anytime maybe during block suppers which is damn imba or after chilling out sessions at the rooftop. Fun, fun, fun!
And oh, mfen, i finally know the feeling you were telling me that day!! But if you're going to accept a proposal from a guy who play and sing to you on a guitar, i tink you'll marry a lot of times. LOL! Then my BG has this pair of lovebirds. So sweet and funny. lol! makes me so sian mu! hahaha!
m lazy to type everything out, maybe will post some pics when i get them. There's this senior who looks exactly like winnie tan. No kidding! Same face, same hair, same mannerisms... And this guy who used to relief teach gp at aj... Feels damn weird seeing your teachers dancing and in bikinis and trunks...haha, and the special pal thingy, LOL! my bg keeps teasing me abt him. And all i did was... haha, i'm not going to say it here. but wth! lol! There are some pple whom i genuinely like over there and i tink my BG is one of the more 'ON' ones ard. I tink i learn quite a lot from this camp. Got the contact list so easier to get a room at blk D, i guess. At least i know wad to expect during other camps, lessons, hall life etc...
I tink there will be some form of meeting up soon next week. I hope its not on the next weekend cos i won't be in s'pore then. Emails are flying around and this guy suggessted going geylang... to eat... then picnic under the stars, ok wadever...
I'm sorry if i didn't reply missed calls or msgs. Too tired. haha. Ok, i need to bathe then go auntie jo jo's house for dinner. I'm feeling hungry now though, shall go hunt for food now! haha,ok, ciao!
reply to tags:
pearlyn: you can go just go back to aj to get your sgc. No need to call cheng. I'm getting other stuff from him.
chups & wf: ((:
yh: I miss you so so so much. You haf no idea how much i wish you're by my side now.
lu: hahah! stop being so workaholic! and look at the HINTS!! part on top. LOL!
Sunday, June 03, 2007
WHY??
I cried. I am so tired. Mentally and emotionally. I'd never wanted to step into this mire in the first place. Why drag me in? Why call me? Why change my opinions?
I am sorry. I am exhausted.
A lifejacket
Since dear old lu asked me to update, i will. Hey, when's our kayaking trip? but heard someone died recently from kayaking hor? hahaha, and i couldn't stop tinking abt the backpacking in tibet adventure. Exciting. haha. i need some recovery. And lu, i'm not trying to sway your decision, but NUS econs is better and just imagine, same coursemates, you'll get to see me everyday... lol!
Ok, i dunno wad to blog about. It seems there's no point in blogging. Some pple are just not worthy enough to let them know you. You wouldn't even want to talk to them. I'd rather meet up or just talk to on the phone.
Ok, let me think... thurs was Pirates of carribean, pretty kickass. But the ending was... ok, let me ruin it for you all... ha, ok, i'm not in the mean mood but yeah, elizabeth dun love jack sparrow. Oh, sorry lians, i am forced to watch it. Really! but i really really dun mind watching it with you guys again. And the spongebob thingy at expo, you guys tink abt it, ok?? LOL!! Oh, and if you're watching pirates, don't leave before the credits end. There's stuff after the credits.
Fri was billy bombers and not enough time to talk. I haven't finish abt taiwan yet. ha and that charsiewbao(lol!) ar, came down all the way to go home with us.
Sat, erm.. No, i didn't manage to last thru sponge-a-thon. LOL! Played with my neighbours after that and one of them was desmond koh's nephew or smth. Called lester, molester the lester.lol! Then we brought chowchow to the swimming pool to play, we wanted to see her swim. Haha, ok, so i just wade in the baby pool, carrying chowchow and put her on the swimming board, with the kids in the water supporting it. Then let her float slowly, before removing it. She can swim pretty well, erm.. more of struggling actually, but yeah.. Ha, poor old dog! Yep, then i pushed one of them into the pool and i kana got pushed in, so ended up swimming in full gear. Then its big shit. I looked like some deranged water ghost that has escaped from some ghostly mental hospital and many pple recognised me. If you realise my occupation and location by now, you'd know how big shit i'm in. Crawling up wet from the pool in wet clothes, then cycling around the place WET with a toot fringe with a bunch of noisy kids, whose sole enjoyment is to scream and kick. And the worst thing, get recognised! shit! There is a serious lack of privacy living here.
Went to meet them 2 after that for dinner and yeah, talk. Nice hearty talk which made me tink a lot. I tink we can go on and on for a few more hrs except that i've got 8 missed calls from my mom. But next time, meet earlier la, i cannot tahan the midnight taxifare.
Yep, then tomolo will be meeting the lians to go cheenatown and coolieland. haha. But i got to leave early cos' my aunt force my mom to force me to go for dinner becos' i've not gone for dinners for a damn long time. I have very poor time management. Its 3am now and i'll prolly wake up at 1. Got to go buy camp stuff, pack camp stuff, write an ultra good appeal letter which gonna take me a few hrs, meet lians then family dinner. Wow!
Then its gg back aj on mon, get sgc from cheng followed by the kent ridge camp thingy. Ok, i must remember to cancel my tuitions and piano lesson.
There's a thin line between love and hate. You can't haf any hate without any love. The worst form of feeling is not hate, but apathy. Its when you totally don't give a damn abt that person then it means the person dun matter to you. I realised i dun really give a damn abt it, abt some, and i'm glad well, maybe except for one. Its hard to let go but you know you'll get yourself into deeper shit if you don't.
I let you into my heart and like a sharp knife, you carve me up. Still, i let you.